Recipe Inspiration Machine

Coming up with dozens of recipes for a whole damn cookbook is hard. If you’re lucky, your grandma was a beautiful, old Italian witch who lived in a cave and did nothing but cook and bake and then shared her recipe notebook with you before she moved on to Ghost City. The rest of us losers have to come up with all our own recipes using our dumb brains. Well friends, I’ve invented a machine designed to tickle our mind-nipples and jumpstart recipe brilliance.

BEHOLD – the Recipe Inspiration Machine (RIM).

Are you ready for a RIM JOB? Here’s how it works! (Note for later: reconsider RIM JOB.)

First off, make a cootie-catcher. Here’s a video in case an olden-times 3rd gade girl is unavailable to help you with this simple AF origami project.

On the outside, write the kinds of things your book is about. Like if you’re a baker, do what I did and write COOKIE, CAKE, PIE and ICE CREAM SITUATION on the outside tabs. If your book is like savory whatevers, maybe your tabs are like APPETEASER, SALAD, ENTREE, SIDE PIECE. If your book is seasonal bullhonk, it’s like WINTER, ALLERGY SEASON, SUMMERTIME SADNESS, and AUTUMN. Do whatever the fuck you want.

And then the inside flaps are all just numbers. I find that a simple 1 – 8 numbering system suffices, but again – DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

Now, here’s the fun part. Beneath each inside flap, write in ingredients designed to challenge you!

I chose a variety of ingredients that I think would stretch my brains to think new thoughts! Just imagine a blue cheese cake! WOW! And what about a figgy ice cream? NEAT!

But again – choose ingredients that apply to your field of interest. If your cookbook is cocktail themed, maybe your inside flaps should be like MAPLE SYRUP, BUD LIGHT, CEREAL MILK, BONG WATER, CRÈME DE MENTHE, SUNNY D, BANANA PUDDING and CLAMATO. I can’t stress this enough – it’s up to you, Magoo. So have fun and do whatever curls your short hairs!

Once your flaps have all been filled out, you’re off to the races! Every recipe will be a guaranteed smash-hit and that’s a RIMMER GUARANTEE!

NOTE: If you like this idea and it helps you with actual recipes that end up in a published cookbook, you had better add my dumb name (AND FACE) in your Acknowledgements section.

OK! Thanks for reading this and god bless!