Steve* the Meatloaf Monster

Here’s a behind-the-scenes peek into my process. I’m working a little out of order on recipe development. This week, I’m working on a concept called Meatloaf Monsters because it’s still a little cool temp-wise in Columbus this weekend and I just don’t want to be firing up a 400 degree oven when it’s hotter than the devil’s danglers outside.

Meatloaf Monsters won’t show up in my dumb cookbook until like maybe Chapter 13 or 14. A real end of the book idea…. The story behind the Meatloaf Monster sits right on top of the Hades / Persephone myth. You see, in the world of the Baker’s Dozen, there’s a character named Baconetta who is the muse of occasional meats. She was blasted out of a volcano fully formed and wearing a lime green bikini. No follow-up questions, OK? Without giving too much away, she gets kidnapped by a monster who is half-man half-meatloaf and his name is Steve.* You’re gonna have to buy the book to get the details….

And here’s my first draft of a meatloaf monster recipe:

3lb ground turkey (this is a turkey meatloaf FYI)
2 eggs
1 cup breadcrumbs
1/3 cup parmesan shreds
1/4 cup chopped onion
1/4 cup ketchup
1 tsp chopped parsley

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees and get your baking dish oiled up.

Dump your ingredients into a large mixing bowl and mix them all up with your hands. Divide the combined meat-mixture into two balls / then shape into loaf shapes.

Now then – decorate your meat loaves with whatever you’ve got still hanging around the kitchen. Onions make great eyes and teeth. (NOTE – I made a mouth reservoir and filled it with ketchup and that’s where the onion teeth go.) Parsley makes great eyebrows and mustaches. That’s what I did here, but get creative. Meatloaf monsters should be scary, but not too scary.