Royal Icing Practice!

Hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi!

Y’all. Piping royal icing is fucking hard! Ugh – how will I ever CRUSH my friend’s 11 year-old daughter’s start-up cookie business??? This kid is getting cookie orders from all over the city and I’m just dicking around with this DUMB BLOG!

Today was a half step forward. I bought a case of ginger cookies from ikea for a half-kroner and piped these gorgeous beauties. Haven’t gotten to do much flood work yet, but I feel like this is an improvement over my holiday sweaters from two weeks ago.

Oh! I just tasted one of these cookies and it’s fucking delicious! IKEA!!!! You damned did it again!

Here’s a quicko catch-up on other things going on in my young life:

  • We just had layoffs and a re-org at Nationwide which made me feel very icky and out of control. Thankfully I survived, but it all makes me feel real crazy, so to regain order of my life – I’m conducting a re-org of my life! LIFE RE-ORG!!!! Everyone is going to have to reapply for their positions! I’m reassessing everything! Including my wardrobe and SIGNATURE SCENTS! Including whether or not I eat BABY CARROTS! I’m excited to take on this exercise and I’ll keep y’all updated!
  • One thing under consideration is if I should open up a barber shop in the basement of Nationwide and call it The Hair Down There. I just need to take a few barber classes… EASY!
  • It was my dad’s birthday on Saturday. He’s 72 dang years old now. YIKES!!!!! Happy birthday, you old g.d. biscuit
  • I need to lose some dang weight, y’all. Any fun tips on how to not stuff your face with garbage at all times????
  • And what about rupaul all-stars season 4? I very much hate Latrice Royale’s new teeth (very distracting). If I have to choose my top two, I’m going to say Manila Luzon and Valentina. OK?????????????

Did I mention that I’m feeling like this egg white cookbook is maybe a real good idea???? If anyone has any fun egg white ideas, e-mail them to me ASAP so I can steal your ideas and make them my own!

Alright! I think I’ll do one more bake before Christmas, but if I don’t – MERRY CHRISTMAS, TEAM!!!!

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